Well I never learned to drive boys,
But you know when I do
I’ll go up to the blueys (brindies)
And drink tinnies till I spew
And wake up in the morning
Just glad to be alive
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I wish I owned a ute from 1962
With chromed up type A hubcabs
All done up in holden blue
I’d cruise around the suburbs
My girlfriend by my side
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I never learned to drive boys,
But you know when I do
I’ll go up to the blueys (brindies)
And drink tinnies till I spew
And wake up in the morning
Just glad to be alive
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I wish I owned a datsun z from 1975
Id knock holes in the muffler
Down the Main Street I would drive
and by that burbled roaring
Lord you’d know that I’d arrived
But i never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I never learned to drive boys,
But you know when I do
I’ll go up to the blueys (brindies)
And drink tinnies till I spew
And wake up in the morning
Just glad to be alive
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I wish I owned a Hoey
In shiny Maza green
I’d hoon it though the car shows
Hear those v8 pistons scream
And all the crowd assembled
Would wonder at the scene
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I never learned to drive boys,
But you know when I do
I’ll go up to the blueys (brindies)
And drink tinnies till I spew
And wake up in the morning
Just glad to be alive
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Hell I’d even drive a beatle with peeling green veneer
A grinding in one cylinder
And missing second gear
Cos you know that piece of shit
Would still go anywhere but here
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
Well I never learned to drive boys,
But you know when I do
I’ll go up to the blueys (brindies)
And drink tinnies till I spew
And wake up in the morning
Just glad to be alive
But I never learned to drive boys, I never learned to drive
We love singing this song by Scroggin Band. So much so that Dan Barron-Hyland customised it (I never learned to mask boys). I cannot find it on the internet, so I include it here. We learnt it from the Canberra Shanty Club at the National Folk Festival in 2023.
The original song we learnt refers to the Brindies (the Brindabellas, a mountain range near Canberra). The Canberra people kindly customised it for Sydney consumption, calling the Blue Mountains the Blueys. Of course Sydney-siders call the Blue Mountains “The Mountains”, but it’s too late now!
Featured image: a Datsun 260z.
